I’m switching this blog from narrative to more of a diary-esque blog. I want to see how much I can unpack without unpacking my life too much.
2021 was pretty much a punch to the gut. A lot of hard, hard stuff went down. A lot of people have been telling me that was their life, too. Or, if it wasn’t, it was someone’s that they know. For me, 2021 will be the year I lost my dad and got hit with anxiety.
So where’s that put me now? Well. I already am working out my inner angst with a highly talented team of professionals. It’s a bumpy trip. Ride. Whatever. But, I am getting better. I think.
No worse, that’s for sure. I’m able to make it most days now without sobbing my eyes out. I feel like that’s progress!
I still can’t really talk to strangers well. And I still am avoiding people, phone calls, and social media. But I think it’s working. All the fear of doing something wrong, saying something wrong, well, it is shrinking some. Probably because I’m learning so much about me right now.
But that’s the hard stuff.
The fun stuff. (Which, admittedly, there’s more than I previously thought with my doomy-gloomy thoughts.)
- I nest regularly with more pillows & blankets than I can carry in two trips
- Sometimes I nest in a blanket fort
- I regularly work in my journals, which can include processing with markers
- My Co-Writer has dutifully set up the groundwork for our masterpieces to be on WorldAnvil
- I have been going grape nuts in WorldAnvil trying to get all the “floating plots” entered in
- My Husband convinces me daily with hugs & kisses that I’m worth all this trouble
- We have an understanding in my house now: if I’m carrying either of my stuffed animals, it’s a high-anxiety day
- I’m allowed to be non-verbal for however long I want from day to day
- When I have the energy to, I make scones
- I’m in love with coffee right now… With hazelnut creamer
- I’ve switched from Cokes to Dr. Pepper and I’ve determined Dr. Pepper can mostly cure a foul mood
- My Husband gave me a Watercolors kit with paper and everything, and I’m experimenting with all sorts of fun methods
- I’m more than halfway through my Magnolia Manifesto Leather Journal
- I get to chomp as many Spearmint Life Mints as I want (my go-to anti-anxiety stave-off)
- I’m getting to choose my work hours because my Boss is amazing beyond belief!
- My HSP traits aren’t just tolerated—I’m getting told daily that it’s good I’m this way
I guess life is shining with hopefulness right now.
I need this hope. I thank God for His moving all these things around me to show me His love. I feel it big time.
The word for 2022 is Trust.
January has already had a lot of that. So here we go.
I’m gonna see what all I want to journal about. Right now I’m feeling like talking life, current WIP struggles, HSP peace that I find, and all the other stuff I can do fast and not care too much.
But the main Q: Is it ‘journal’ or ‘diary’?